Friday, 19 September 2008

amireallysureaboutthis?


bismillahirrahmanirrahim
salam

there were so many things moving and going around my mind right now. i dunno what and i dun feel like sharing it here. but since i have time and there is no other topic for me to write,i guess i'll just give it a go...
i feel like i do not want to pursue my career in teaching. seriously,no.not because i dun like it, it's just that i dun have the guts to do it..my heart is not beating fast when i teach.i guess, i think i cannot do what i was forced to do. i guess i'll be happier doing what i wanna do. and that is maybe, being an event manager, or hosting a tv show, my english tv show :p or maybe a news presenter :D haha :P

i would like to be in the media line, the creative line, hehe :D i want to be able to express my feelings :D acting in theaters would be really cool..i wanna do that. i want to be able to do that :D well, i guess, time will have to change me.
i love my students. i love them very much. it's just that whenever i teach, my mind would always be uncomfortable. and it of course, affected my body, my soul..i feel that i need to get free, get to be loosen up a bit. and do what is comfortable for my soul,my body :-/

i want to be host who gets to travel. like her :D

i know many will say ' i tot u like teaching?' here's a correction. i love my students. i really really love them. but i have no heart in teaching. it's not there...:( i'm sorry to say this.

and although i grow to like it and i continue to grow to like it, i just cannot lie to myself. the satisfaction is not guaranteed. what do i really want? the ability to be able to express myself..in writing,in talking, in actions :)


if anyone knows whether i have that talent, do recommend me something nice :) and,i'll try to be your event manager, just test me :)
Teaching is soo cool and noble, but nothing beats your real dream and desires.

okies:P i think that's all.c ya later alligators... :D

6 comments:

Md Zaini Zulkufli said...

r u sure about this?..well..its up to u lah :) btw..don't forget that u still have 5 years contract with gov..huhu..

Atie Kamil said...

ala...jgn la mcm ni. temporary vibe je kot. tp kan i pn minatt sgt nk msuk media stream....i heard dat people like us mmg qualify. maybe u should pursue ur dreams then...

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Your Average Mat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Your Average Mat said...

The idea of teaching and the reality of teaching aint the same thing. This also apply to other areas of work. We might think that doing something else is way more cool-ler but we need to get there first to know the reality side of it.

COol girl. We still young and need time to explore. Do some more research first before jumping into other areas. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

you know nani, we're in the same boat.juz now a junior asked me when am i going to be posted. i said i didnt even fill in the form.he said "kak, u can be a really good teacher.why do you do that?".

i like teaching, its just that i'm not comfortable of keeping a close eye on other people's children.when we teach, we cant just teach.like it or not. we would be immersed in the kids' world, and sooner or later, we'll know their deepest, darkest secret.

during my practicum, students came to me and told me their life problems.one even told me her mother is depressing the living daylights out of her becuz "mama left papa for a bangladeshi guy".
what am i to do?

i seriously dont think i have what it takes. i can work hard at it, but if i dont have the heart for it, better not start, rite?

good luck to you in everything that you do.sometimes we could only find love in what we do when the right time comes.pray a lot.who knows? nanti Allah kirimkan seru pada nani.

wish me luck! (Am job-hunting now...hehe)

mi amor

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