peer pressure

salam

Things ain’t easy when you are new.
Things will go not smooth for you.
I beg to differ.
In some blessed places, things are very easy when you are new.
For example
SMK Labu Besar, Kulim.
Knowing the teachers/colleagues seemed pretty easy
A smile would be replied with another friendly smile.
Chatting with them in the staff room was like having your family there.
You don’t feel so homesick, really.
I was blessed to be given SMKLB for practicum.
The colleagues there are all I ever did need to survive.

I think you could guess what my point is, by now.
Like Katy Perry sings.
“comparisons are easily made,
once you had a taste of perfection”

I’m sorry I couldn’t help comparing.
I’m human. It lives in me.
Blame me if you must.
Guilty as charged.
Whatever you say,
I will never stop comparing.

It’s hard when people look at you differently like you’re a weird attention seeker newbie.
It’s difficult when people see you as a threat for their career, popularity or even physical attributes.
It ain’t easy when you are in my place.
Right now, in this exact spot.
It ain’t easy to be yourself here.
I had to pretend to be somebody I am not.
That’s a waste because I was ME when I was in Labu Besar.
Not here.
Never here.
I just became somebody else to make things easier.
Don’t tell me to be me, ok?
Sometimes that advise doesn’t apply
Especially, specifically, HERE.

The conclusion is,
I miss Labu Besar, so damn much, with every bits of my life and soul =(

“hidup ni memang p##at. tapi esok masih ada”
- KAMI the movie

Life must go on.
Mama said, to be happy, I must love what I do.
I am, trying to love what I do
To every extent possible
And may God bless me with miracles.
Amin.

Allah is great. This is my test. I am very lucky.
Alhamdulillah.